Haven't blogged much lately. No excuse really, just kind of in a "blog funk" or blunk.
School is officially out for summer. Everyone on Facebook has been posting statuses like "...can't wait for my kids to be home all day!" or "...is so excited about spending time with my kiddos!" or "...woohoo! School's out!". And with each one I read, I squirm a little more in my guilt.
First of all, I cannot stand the word "kiddos". I think it should be moved to the top of the list of words that are blacklisted from the English language. It just reminds me of little kids with spaghetti-o's smeared on their faces, which brings back a childhood memory of the two weeks I spent in daycare where they fed us those foul little rings with a side of peas and carrots and then made us lay down for "rest time". I still remember "GranGran" walking around with a yard stick poking those of us who couldn't quite get settled in. My mother thought I needed some socialization, being an only child and all, so she made me go. But when I protested on the grounds that they made us take "the longest naps in history", she relented and signed me up for art lessons instead. But I digress...
Where was I? Oh yes, my guilt. Am I the only mother who has secretly dreaded the last day of school? Its not that I don't love my children; I'm just better able to express that love between the hours of 3:00 and 9:00 p.m. Its not that I don't want to spend time with my kids; I just prefer quality over quantity. And its not that I don't enjoy my children; I just have other interests (and a life) that don't always revolve around them.
Fortunately, we have some things planned this summer that should help us prevent any loss of life as well as protect Mom's proverbial "last nerve" from being shattered. Next week we are going camping. I've never been camping before, but BigJoel rented us an RV and we're headed to Beaver's Bend for a couple of relaxing days. I'm sure this will be the stuff fond memories are made of...
Later in the month, Hallie will be going to Pre-teen Camp with our church. She's very excited. And I am already praying for the brave saint who will be staying in a room with her and three other 9 year olds who've never been away from home before.
In July, we are going on a family vacation. We haven't gone on a true vacation together as a family since...I honestly don't know when. I've blocked it out because it was such a traumatic experience of whining and pouting and squabbling. Its still up in the air, but we're leaning towards a road trip to Chicago. I just know that now the girls are older and can more easily tolerate 15-16 hours in a car...right? All that matters is the Giordanno's pizza waiting for me in the Windy City.
Then HannahKate will go to Youth Camp. This is always bittersweet for me. Up until six years ago, I had been to Youth Camp every single summer of my entire life since 6th grade. Because Joel was a youth minister, it was in my wedding vows "to love, honor and go to Youth Camp". Now when that bus full of teenagers pulls out of the church parking lot headed for camp, all I can think is "I'm so glad its them and not me!"
By that time, it will be August and we'll begin two-a-day volleyball practices, shopping for school supplies and searching high and low for standardized-dress clothes that will fit a short, round 4th grader.
I guess looking at it all laid out like that, summer's not so bad after all. I think I might even be a little excited about it myself now. If nothing else, maybe it'll at least give me something to blog about and bring me out of this blunk I've been in for too long.